This here, this watch, they call it High imitation Rolex Submariner Green, sounds fancy, right? Well, let me tell you somethin’. It’s like my old man’s rooster, all show and no crow when the sun comes up. Looks good from far, but far from good, you know what I mean?
I seen these young folks, they wear these shiny things on their wrists. Think they’re somethin’ special. This Rolex Submariner, they say it’s the best. Pfft, best at what? Telling time? My kitchen clock does that just fine, and it ain’t cost me an arm and a leg. My old man, bless his soul, he used to say, “A fool and his money are soon parted.” He sure was right about that.
Now, this here green one, this Rolex Submariner Green. They say it’s a “classic style”. Classic like my old mule, Betsy. Stubborn and gets you where you need to go, but sure ain’t pretty. They put a green face on it. Why green? Reminds me of that pond scum down by the creek. Not somethin’ I’d want on my wrist, no sir.
I heard ’em talkin’ ’bout “alternatives”. That’s a fancy word for “cheaper”. They say if you can’t get a real Rolex Submariner, you can get one that looks like it. They showed me some pictures. One was called an “Omega Seamaster”, 42mm they said. Millimeters, schmillmeters. What does that even mean? My thumb’s bigger than that! It’s all numbers and fancy talk. Just like them city folk, tryin’ to sound smarter than they are.
Then there’s this other one, “Bulova Marine Star”. Sounds like a boat. They say it’s made of “stainless steel”. Sounds tough, I guess. My old washin’ tub is stainless steel, and it’s held up for years. So maybe this watch will too. They say it looks like a Rolex Submariner. I reckon it does, a little bit, if you squint your eyes and don’t look too close. It’s like puttin’ lipstick on a pig. Still a pig, just with a little somethin’ extra.
- Rolex Submariner Green, they say it is classic.
- Omega Seamaster, big number, 42mm.
- Bulova Marine Star, look like Rolex, but not Rolex.
- Seiko, Steinhart, all look same to me.
Some other names they threw around, “Seiko” and “Steinhart”. More names to remember. It’s like tryin’ to keep track of all my neighbor’s chickens. They all look the same after a while. They say these are good “look-alikes”. Well, I guess if you’re into that sort of thing. Me? I’d rather have a good pie than a fake watch. At least a pie fills your belly.
They went on and on about these Rolex Submariner watches, real ones and fake ones. Showed me pictures, zoomed in real close. Said you could see the difference if you knew what to look for. Tiny little details, they said. Like the way the numbers are, or how the little hand moves. Who has time to look that close? I can barely see the big hand on my kitchen clock without my glasses.
I’ll tell you what it is. It is like buyin a pig in a poke, you don’t know what you’re gonna get in it. Could be a good watch, could be a lemon. Just like my cousin, used to buy them used cars. Sometimes they run like a dream, sometimes they just sit there and rust. You gotta be careful, that’s what I always say.
This High imitation Rolex Submariner Green, it is like any other. You want a real one? You better have the money for it. You wanna show off? Maybe you can use that money to buy somethin’ else, something real, something useful. Maybe a good pair of boots, that will last you a long time. Or a good strong fence, that will keep your animals in. Or maybe some good seed, you can grow somethin’.
These young folks, they chase after these fancy things. But me, I know what’s important. A good roof over your head, food on the table, and family by your side. That’s worth more than any Rolex Submariner, green or otherwise. They can keep their fancy watches. I’ll stick to what I know. And what I know is, a good life ain’t about what’s on your wrist, it’s about what’s in your heart.
So, you go on and chase your High imitation Rolex Submariner Green. But me, I’m gonna go sit on my porch and watch the sun set. And I won’t need no fancy watch to tell me it’s time for supper.
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